Sheer panic. Utter terror. Heart thumping so hard I felt like I was having a heart attack. I felt like everyone could see it pounding, bouncing off the walls it felt so loud and hard.
My body trembles, my vision becomes blurred. I can't see nor think straight. Everyone knows. I blush from head to toe out of shame of being so weak. Why can't I stop it? I try but this makes it worse. I want to jump into a big hole and stay there forever. It passes and circumstances move on, but I don't.
People witnessed my panic attack so now I need to avoid them as they now know what I am really like. I fear putting myself in any situations that cause this reaction so I avoid people and situations. I become depressed and isolated in my own existence. This now becomes an automatic behaviour even in situations with no perceived threat. It feels like having chains around your legs, an unbearably heavy weight to carry on your shoulders. You never know when or where it may happen again so I need to be aware and on guard, all the time.
This is an example of what I experienced often but didn't know how to help myself. My body and brain were screaming out for help. If only I had techniques to help. The effects of this type of chronic anxiety are so damaging and debilitating to every part of one's life. At breaking point some 12 year ago I reached out to my doctor for help. That day marked the first day of the rest of my life. I was given a get out of jail free card and it has changed my life forever.
Learning that this wasn't actually me changed everything. I took medication and learned about how my brain worked and mindfulness. This combination has enabled me to be who I really am with confidence and to live my life fully without fear. Medication stabilises any chemical imbalance and mindfulness empowers me to be more in control of my mind and body and my life. I do wish I had the skills I have now when I was younger.
If I had a broken arm Id go to a doctor, right? So If I'm not feeling right in myself I should also seek assistance and support. You owe it to yourself to live the happiest and best life you can. We all need help sometimes and it is the strong one who reaches out to ask. Anxiety can be hereditary and/or caused by life's events and being surrounded by toxic influences. It's imperative to your health, well being and happiness to become aware of the triggers and symptoms. In doing so you can use different modalities and practices to support your. You're not alone, you don't have to fight it anymore.
Today more than ever we need to equip ourselves with a toolbox of coping skills to manage life's challenges in a more helpful way. By doing so we support ourselves in living a happier and more
fulfilling personal and professional life.
There are so many ways to manage panic and anxiety, seek out what suits you best and reclaim your Inner Happy today.
visit www.inner-happy.com where I offer a self study video course called Breaking the chains of Anxiety.
I will also be hosting a workshop 'Manage Anxiety with Mindfulness on 27th August. visit eventbrite to book.
Sue
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